I love watching fireworks.
I love the wind on my face, especially if it’s the last days of the year.
I love Spider – Man and I wish I could meet Tobey Maguire someday.
I… I know I won’t be interesting for you ever, so I’ll stop this foolishness.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
For Superman*
We became friends because of the most awkward ways. If I can remember right, we’ve been introduced to each other for four times before you remember who I am. But I have always known you… you are the guy who swept me off my feet on my first day in high school.
I don’t even really know what to call you: if you’re my best friend or a mere acquaintance; if you are my closest guy friend or just a person to whom I decided to confide myself in. we are so close to each other that you know my dreams, and I know yours. But you’re so far that the longest conversation I had with you in person lasted for just a minute.
It was just recently that we sent messages to each other again, after a long, long hiatus brought about by your being a student nurse and my academic stuff. It’s all so different now, the way we view things and our topics for conversation. I have sensed that you and I have grown and changed a lot, and the things we used to talk about are not exactly the topics we want to be brought up now.
I tried to search my mind for something we used to talk about… I found the words you used to say to make me feel alright. Though I lost both phones wherein I used to save your messages, I can still remember the most special ones, almost word-by-word. I remember you used to worry because I always stay up late and you fear that I may become anemic, so you told me to go to sleep. You inspired me, and I was part of you as well. You make me sad, and you know how to make up on it. You were the person to believe in me, even when I myself do not. You are one of the best things to happen in my life. I loved you very much, and I think I still do. But things aren’t the same.
I miss the old you like heck. I wanted to talk with you again like we are just trying to know each other. I wanted to hear again from you those words you said to me, that I am important and you wish you could make me feel it. I just want us to be back to the way we used to. I want to go back to those times that I feel you really want to know me as much as I want to know you. I want to talk to you all day on the phone, talking about things which are not important at all but I treasure very much. I miss the days when we talk about our interests, dreams, favorite movies, songs and everything about superman. I miss the days when we used to be closer than we are today... those days when I think I am the only one you want to know more about.
Those days are gone. Whether it’s because you know me better now and the stage of knowing each other is over or simply because you don’t care about me anymore, I don’t really know. But one thing’s for sure – I miss the person who seemed to care about me and make me happy like no one else could. I miss you who shares with me his innermost thoughts and feelings, because nothing of those were left. I miss you, and I just don’t understand why things go this way.
I don’t even really know what to call you: if you’re my best friend or a mere acquaintance; if you are my closest guy friend or just a person to whom I decided to confide myself in. we are so close to each other that you know my dreams, and I know yours. But you’re so far that the longest conversation I had with you in person lasted for just a minute.
It was just recently that we sent messages to each other again, after a long, long hiatus brought about by your being a student nurse and my academic stuff. It’s all so different now, the way we view things and our topics for conversation. I have sensed that you and I have grown and changed a lot, and the things we used to talk about are not exactly the topics we want to be brought up now.
I tried to search my mind for something we used to talk about… I found the words you used to say to make me feel alright. Though I lost both phones wherein I used to save your messages, I can still remember the most special ones, almost word-by-word. I remember you used to worry because I always stay up late and you fear that I may become anemic, so you told me to go to sleep. You inspired me, and I was part of you as well. You make me sad, and you know how to make up on it. You were the person to believe in me, even when I myself do not. You are one of the best things to happen in my life. I loved you very much, and I think I still do. But things aren’t the same.
I miss the old you like heck. I wanted to talk with you again like we are just trying to know each other. I wanted to hear again from you those words you said to me, that I am important and you wish you could make me feel it. I just want us to be back to the way we used to. I want to go back to those times that I feel you really want to know me as much as I want to know you. I want to talk to you all day on the phone, talking about things which are not important at all but I treasure very much. I miss the days when we talk about our interests, dreams, favorite movies, songs and everything about superman. I miss the days when we used to be closer than we are today... those days when I think I am the only one you want to know more about.
Those days are gone. Whether it’s because you know me better now and the stage of knowing each other is over or simply because you don’t care about me anymore, I don’t really know. But one thing’s for sure – I miss the person who seemed to care about me and make me happy like no one else could. I miss you who shares with me his innermost thoughts and feelings, because nothing of those were left. I miss you, and I just don’t understand why things go this way.
Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone…
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone…
That song used to be your song for me… I wonder if you’ve forgotten it already. But I did not, and I’ll always be here. Always.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Just got to let it all out.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (INSERT EXPLETIVES HERE) @!*^#@*!$#@!
Still it's not enough. I want to tear you into pieces so I would not continue to fall for you like this.
THIS IS SO FREAKIN' WRONG.
I hate you. But I still love you.
I just wanna go to bed, slash my wrists and cry myself to sleep while listening to an emo song. Crazy, but that’s how I feel. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
You know how much I hate to turn this blog into an emo machine.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Of Present and Past Teachers
Yesterday I was going home when I decided to stop by Mc Donald’s UN and get something to eat. I went to the restroom first to fix myself when I heard a song that I thought is a revelation… the song “Burn” by Tina Arena. Hell, maybe the song tells me to go straight home and review for my freakin’ majors (to those who don’t get this, I’m sorry). So there, I went to the LRT station after fixing myself… and yeah, I did not purchase anything.
After I boarded the train, slept in the bus and rode the karatig, I went to a shoe store to buy another pair of shoes which I could easily wear especially when I am in a hurry (I am using my hi-cut Pony shoes so… it’s kinda hard and depressing to devote 10 minutes just putting my shoes on my overwhelmingly wide feet). After I’ve bought the cute pair at a surprisingly low price (I just hope the pair would last long), I decided to board the last ride so I could get home. Then, going to the terminal, I saw my grade five adviser, who is one of my favorite elementary teachers (there are two, the other one is her sister, who was my second grade adviser). I almost hugged her because I haven’t seen her for a while and I was happy that she still remembers me. Hell, if I was her, and I face 50 (or more) students every year, and was greeted by a student from more than half a decade ago, I doubt that I’d still remember that student, especially someone who was not even her top student. But she did, and she even remembered to say hello to my brother, who was also her student. I did not even realize how amazing it would feel to see my teacher who helped me decide what I want to be, now that I am almost reaching that dream (I just hope I’ll graduate). But still, I just have to thank her. Have she not included me into the list of participants in that press conference, I would have been just another student who still does not know what she wants.
…but right now, I still have to think about these professors in my major subjects if I really want to reach that dream, especially the one who wants us to burn. Geez, I really hope I could internal-combust in his class so he would not have to do the favor and burn me, alive.
After I boarded the train, slept in the bus and rode the karatig, I went to a shoe store to buy another pair of shoes which I could easily wear especially when I am in a hurry (I am using my hi-cut Pony shoes so… it’s kinda hard and depressing to devote 10 minutes just putting my shoes on my overwhelmingly wide feet). After I’ve bought the cute pair at a surprisingly low price (I just hope the pair would last long), I decided to board the last ride so I could get home. Then, going to the terminal, I saw my grade five adviser, who is one of my favorite elementary teachers (there are two, the other one is her sister, who was my second grade adviser). I almost hugged her because I haven’t seen her for a while and I was happy that she still remembers me. Hell, if I was her, and I face 50 (or more) students every year, and was greeted by a student from more than half a decade ago, I doubt that I’d still remember that student, especially someone who was not even her top student. But she did, and she even remembered to say hello to my brother, who was also her student. I did not even realize how amazing it would feel to see my teacher who helped me decide what I want to be, now that I am almost reaching that dream (I just hope I’ll graduate). But still, I just have to thank her. Have she not included me into the list of participants in that press conference, I would have been just another student who still does not know what she wants.
…but right now, I still have to think about these professors in my major subjects if I really want to reach that dream, especially the one who wants us to burn. Geez, I really hope I could internal-combust in his class so he would not have to do the favor and burn me, alive.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Light On!
i think this video is great. my favorite part is watching them ride the bike in the end. *aww* David Cook and the director, Wayne Isham did an excellent job in making this video. i love it, and i'm sure many other fans do, too. :)
Friday, November 7, 2008
panext :D
Today I turn 18. Of legal age, no more DSWD, I’ll be going straight to prison if ever I kill someone (this would not happen though, ‘coz I am a veeery good person). Oh well, on the brighter side, I do not have to sign waivers and get parental consents anymore because I am of legal age. I can donate blood and do whatever I want without having to ask permission, haha. The past year had been a blast, and I think my 17th year was one of the craziest ever. Looking back, for the past year I…
Got my first Uno
Made friends with professors
Lost faith and had God bring it back again
Bonded with block mates and classmates
Bonded a lot with my beybehs (mi pelu, aira and yayie)
Spent summer at the University
Made new friends
Have been a student of the best professors
Have been a student of not-so-good professors
Have been a student of the most panext professors! LOL
Got together with high school friends
Had crazy classmates (PE! Blue team FTW!)
Am still falling in love
Have been part of a thousand camwhoring sessions
Had a typhoon named after me (I wished it was not)
Am starting to spend time in the library (whoa, this is weird)
Got DJ, my iPod
Ate a lot, drank a lot of water, coffee and Gatorade propel, and dreamt a lot. And I mean a LOT.
Met Tado, ‘Ma man!
Have been a member of Organizations
Lost some friends but gained more
Am starting to enjoy my UP life more and more
Taught kids at Sunday school
Waited. And still waiting for the best things to come.
Made friends with professors
Lost faith and had God bring it back again
Bonded with block mates and classmates
Bonded a lot with my beybehs (mi pelu, aira and yayie)
Spent summer at the University
Made new friends
Have been a student of the best professors
Have been a student of not-so-good professors
Have been a student of the most panext professors! LOL
Got together with high school friends
Had crazy classmates (PE! Blue team FTW!)
Have been part of a thousand camwhoring sessions
Had a typhoon named after me (I wished it was not)
Am starting to spend time in the library (whoa, this is weird)
Got DJ, my iPod
Ate a lot, drank a lot of water, coffee and Gatorade propel, and dreamt a lot. And I mean a LOT.
Met Tado, ‘Ma man!
Have been a member of Organizations
Lost some friends but gained more
Am starting to enjoy my UP life more and more
Taught kids at Sunday school
Waited. And still waiting for the best things to come.
Now while all other girls who turn my age celebrate their birthdays in a night flowing with food and drinks, I would be celebrating mine in our humble abode with my family (which is not even complete), my cousins and aunts and uncles and the closest of my high school friends. This would be my 18th birthday and the 7th with my mom overseas. Dang, I miss her so much. I can’t even remember how it feels to celebrate a birthday with her. Last night she called, and I could hear in her voice how much she wanted to be here. I really wish she’s here too. Oh well, I can’t do anything about it.
(…and then I’ll start thanking everyone) I want to thank God for giving me another year. Not all people my age are given a chance to live this far. And I want to thank Him for still giving me a chance to live though I always make mistakes. I also want to thank Nanay, Kuya, Tatay, and Lola A for giving me a reason to live and for always being patient, more on the times when I am not. To my lovely cousins, I wanna watch movies with you again. And thank you for just being my built-in girlfriends. To my ‘celo people, I miss you! Sana sa susunod na magkasama tayo isasali nyo ako sa usapan nyo ha? Nag-aaral din kasi ako. Nakakaramdam din ako ng pressure. Ang pinagkaiba lang natin, unibersidad. And to my UPM buddies, a big hug! Thank you for making me enjoy college. :) I love you guys!
To those who remembered, and to those who almost remembered (Superman… you’re the one I am referring to) thank you very much! You don’t know how much you made me happy. To those who came, Annalyn, Arvin, Kaye and Tacio, I love you guys. :) And to those who gave to me whatever gift they can give, to my best friend Maricar, Tita Bhe (I love the shirt!), Tita Mayet (I always smell good after celebrating my birthday! *wink*), Kuya (I would not have anything to blow if not for you. I love you), Tito Jhel (for the beautiful diary), To my cousins Sarah and Leah (You know what I eat during idle times that’s why I love you),Joshua (for the chocolates), Camille (for the Fudgee bar smothered with chocolate cream), Micah (for the Potchi gummy candies, which is the gift that moved me the most)… and to my mom who gave me the best gift earlier this year, an iPod nano. Thank you very much and you know I’ll still love you all even without your gifts. *wink*. PS! To Professor Mary Dorothy Jose who gave me another beautiful gift (without her knowing it), a grade of 1.00 in my History 4 class last semester, thank you very much, Ma’am! Mataas pa rin ang binigay nyo sa'kin kahit na sabaw ang mga reaction paper ko. :) And, a big thank you to those who joined me in celebrating my 18th birthday! I love you.
Click here for my birthday photos. :)
So there, I won’t make this post any longer (because it is long). Again, thank you very much to all who took part in celebrating my birthday. ‘Til here, Take care. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)